It is the moment every new Assistant Principal dreads.
You are 29. The teacher is 55. You have been an admin for 3 months. She has been teaching in that room since you were in kindergarten.
You give a directive: “Mrs. Jones, we need everyone to be at their duty spots by 7:15 AM starting tomorrow to cover the new bus schedule.”
She looks at you, crosses her arms, and says: “No. I’ve done 7:30 for twenty years. I’m not changing my schedule because you can’t figure out the buses.”
She says it in front of three other teachers. The air leaves the room. Everyone is looking at you.
Do you fight? Do you fold? Here is the exact playbook for handling the “Insubordinate Veteran” without starting a war.
Phase 1: The Audience Audit
The mistake most new leaders make is trying to “win” the argument right there in the hallway. If you engage in a power struggle in public, you have already lost.
- If you win, you look like a bully.
- If you lose, you look weak.
The Move: Remove the audience immediately. Just like with de-escalating an angry parent, your first goal is to lower the temperature.
“Mrs. Jones, I want to hear your thoughts on this, but not in the hallway. Come see me in my office in 10 minutes so we can discuss it properly.”
Walk away. Do not wait for a response. You have just de-escalated the scene and bought yourself 10 minutes to breathe.
Phase 2: Curiosity Before Judgment
When she comes to your office, she will be ready for a fight. Do not give her one yet. Often, “insubordination” is just “anxiety” wearing a costume.
“Help me understand the pushback on the 7:15 time. Is there a logistical reason that doesn’t work for you, or is it something else?”
Scenario A (The Valid Reason):
She says, “My own kid gets dropped off at 7:20. I literally can’t get here.”
The Fix: You solve the problem. You aren’t caving; you are leading.
Scenario B (The “Because I Said So”):
She says, “I just shouldn’t have to. It’s ridiculous.”
Now, you have to pivot to the hard part.
Phase 3: The “Clear Choice” (The Nuclear Option)
If she refuses a direct order without a valid reason, that is insubordination. But you don’t start writing her up yet. You give her a “Choice.”
You must separate the person from the behavior.
“I hear that you disagree with the decision. However, as the administration, we have determined this is necessary for student safety. I am giving you a direct directive to be at duty at 7:15. You have a choice to make: You can follow the directive, or you can choose to be insubordinate, which will lead to a write-up. I respect you enough to let you make that decision. What are you going to do?”
Why this works:
- You didn’t threaten: You laid out the cause and effect (“If X, then Y”).
- You gave agency: She has to choose to be insubordinate. Most teachers, when faced with the word “Insubordinate” and a clear choice, will back down.
The Interview Answer
In your AP interview, they will ask: “Tell us about a time you handled a difficult employee.”
Don’t tell them you wrote her up. Tell them: “I believe in private correction. I moved the conversation to my office, listened to her concerns, but ultimately held the line on the standard. She didn’t like it, but she was at duty the next day.”
Need to practice this answer?
The “Insubordinate Teacher” is one of the Core 10 Stories you must have ready for your interview.
If you want the full workbook to map out your answers, download my interview kit below.Get the “Hired at 29” Interview Kit →